Tom was unsettled but day out enjoyed by all of family

Guardian columnist Jo Worgan.
Guardian columnist Jo Worgan.

I thought to myself, “oh dear”, as I sat opening my birthday presents on Sunday morning, not because I didn’t like them, I loved them all, but Tom did not.

He did not like my books, chocolates or DVD, mind you, he did think for a brief second that my Ferrero Roche were marbles, but again became grumpy when he realised that they were not.

We tried to have as much of a normal day as possible, but we could not take away the fact that it was my birthday.

You see, Tom does not like my birthday. He thinks it should be his birthday that is in five weeks’ time. Even though we prepare him for the fact that it will be my birthday and get decorations such as balloons and make a gluten free cake that he will like, he wanted me to have a book birthday cake so Andrew made him one, he was still unsettled and kept saying, “I don’t like mummy’s birthday.”

We tried to lessen the blow by asking Tom where he would like to go for my birthday, he told us that he wanted to go to the ‘car museum’ in Lakeland.

We thought this was a brilliant idea as he loves it there and we did have fun but he played up a little as he was unsettled and not happy that the day was not totally his.

I have to add though that he did enjoy his large bowl of ice cream while we all tucked into sausage and bacon butties. Andrew had also ordered him gluten free chocolate cake, but as there was sauce on it, he would not eat it. However I shared this with Stephen, once Andrew took Tom back around the museum for one last walk about.

We tried to have as much of a normal day as possible, but we could not take away the fact that it was my birthday.

This anxiety though also transferred through to his day at school on Monday. Again he was unsettled, and when I spoke to his teacher, we agreed that it was due to an unsettled weekend. But what can you do? People have birthdays; he needs to learn that we celebrate other people’s birthdays and that we do the same for him.

What was really funny was that he asked for candles on my cake, so dutifully Andrew popped some on. He happily sang along ‘Happy Birthday’ with everyone and then quick as a flash, blew the candles out.

I’m just glad that I never had a party.