Jo Worgan column

Guardian columnist Jo Worgan.
Guardian columnist Jo Worgan.

On Sunday we decided to go and watch the Morecambe Carnival and see the parade of floats, ‘this will be fantastic’, we thought, ‘the boys will love it.’

Well Stephen loved it but not Tom. We had decided to go to the less crowded part of the prom to wave the floats off but as we crossed over the road and the music began to be heard Tom started to pull back on my hand. “No, no we go this way, this way!”

He started to drag me in the opposite direction. Oh no I thought to myself, he doesn’t like the music; I thought it was not too loud but Tom obviously did, the music was coming from one of the floats. He told me, “no party!”

As Tom was becoming more distressed I told Andrew to go ahead with Stephen and that I would wait with Tom as it would soon become quiet once all the floats had set off.

I pulled Tom’s hood up and used my arms in a hug to cover his ears and asked him how he felt, he said “feel nice” and this is how we stood and watched the people passing by.

He kept telling me though that he did not like the “muse-ees” and at the time I thought he was referring to the music, meaning ‘musicians’ but it was only once home and he was talking about them again, doing a demonstration while saying, “they walked like this and their hands like this, there was a bird, a monster and a witch” that I realised he was referring to the stilt walkers, who were all dressed up in spectacular consumes, all of them teetering and obviously threatening to Tom, I had not even consisted this to be the reason for his distress.

This is what he was afraid of and he spoke about them for the remainder of the day telling us, “no party.”

We kept reassuring him that the party was over and that there were no more muse-ees and this seemed to settle him.

What this did show though was that Tom could communicate to us his distress and unease, something that a year ago he would have had difficulty doing, so this in itself is progress.

Anyway all was good in the end as he had an ice cream with Stephen.