Who’s the Daddy? column

Prime Minister David Cameron.
Prime Minister David Cameron.
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There’s an election coming. And the people who’ve been robbing you blind and screwing you over for the past five years are suddenly all nicey nicey because they want you to vote them in power.

Things are getting a bit cheaper. Petrol now costs less per drop than champagne, heating bills have miraculously come down and supermarkets are fighting a price war so you can now feed your family for a week without worrying yourself sick over how you’re going to pay for it.

If there was a We’ll Keep Our Hands Out Of Your Pockets And Our Nose Out Of Your Business Party then they’d get my vote, and probably yours too.

But the state has got its hand in my pocket so often that there’s no room for mine anymore.

Here’s the thing.

We have tax taken off us on what we earn.

Then we pay tax on just about everything we buy.

That is some trick they’ve pulled and more fool us for falling for it.

Thanks to the expenses scandal and a few other things that’ll be coming out in the papers over the next few weeks, our elected leaders currently have as low a reputation as 1970s BBC children’s entertainers and Glam Rock stars (but for different reasons.

That cannot be stated strongly enough).

Somehow the millionaire public schoolboys in power have managed to convince us that we should demonise the poorest among us for claiming benefits, while turning a blind eye to massive corporations who pay less tax in this country than your average busker.

And that’s the thing to remember. Government doesn’t work for you, it serves the interests of the huge corporations which put them in power in the first place.

You are merely a revenue stream to them when you’re working and a drain on their resources when you’re not.

In a few months you can vote for a Blue one, a Red one, a Yellow one, a Green one or a Purple one.

It doesn’t matter.

Mark Twain once said: “If voting made any difference they wouldn’t let us do it.”

Vote if you want, but for all the good it’ll do you might as well draw an X in the air with your finger.