Nostalgia, it isn’t what it used to be. When your kids go misty-eyed over TV shows they used to watch when they were little, then you know that your time has come and gone.
How they hooted with laughter as they discussed the merits of Ned’s Declassified School Survival Guide (the cast of which are now comfortably in their 20s and achingly cool), Blue’s Clues and the daddy of them all, High School Musical.
When films made in 2006 (the last one came out in 2008) are screened by your children’s mind’s eyes in sepia then I’m sorry but Rainbow, Bagpuss and Ivor The Engine have slipped out of popular culture and into a dusty old museum that your kids moan their way around on unsuccessful days out.
It seems like only last week the walls of daughter #1’s then-newly converted loft bedroom were covered with High School Musical bunting.
Such was their devotion, we even made the ultimate sacrifice and got tickets to see the show – on ice – in Manchester.
But the space in daughter #1’s room once filled by HSM ribbons and triangular flags has long since been filled by ticket stubs from all the gigs she’s been to, Depeche Mode, Paloma Faith, Bastille (x2), Kodaline and The Strypes.
And memorabilia from those fine artists is set to be joined by All Time Low and McBusted in the next few weeks.
She actually cried real tears when she found out Bastille were playing at Germany’s Hurricane Festival in June because I’d be seeing them and she wouldn’t.
Anyway, if I thought our eldest daughter had flipped then it was nothing compared to the most recent conversation with my mother when she said she’d been hearing my wife’s voice on the radio. When you think the radio’s talking to you then it’s time to dispose of your assets and see out your drug-addled days in a secure unit.
But no. It turns out she hasn’t got a slate loose after all. The boss had been on The Bay when the station visited the school where she teaches and when my mum switched on the radio, her dulcet tones wafted out of the speakers.
Gave her the shock of her life though.