Columnist Who’s The Daddy: The most wonderful time of the year?

The last two miles of the Great North Run were more fun than the trip around our supermarket the Sunday before Christmas
The last two miles of the Great North Run were more fun than the trip around our supermarket the Sunday before Christmas
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So was it worth it? Was it worth all the hassle, all the money, all the stress and all the time? Do you feel like you’ve fallen for the same trick again or, as the song goes, is it the most wonderful time of the year?

Like every Christmas in our house it’s probably a bit of both. The lead-up to the big day is a festival of rampant consumerism. Everywhere you turn it’s the same message – BUY MORE STUFF YOU DON’T NEED COS IT’S A BIT CHEAPER. COME ON, BUY IT!

But once the agonising and joyless trawl around the supermarket is complete, the last present has been wrapped and the cork comes out of the first bottle of fizz then you’re over the finish line and your medal awaits.

Speaking as someone who has run half-marathons, the last two miles of the Great North Run were more fun than the trip around our supermarket of choice the Sunday before Christmas.

When you roll up to the car park and there’s employees standing around in the freezing cold holding big ‘Spaces Here’ signs to point you in the right direction, then you know the next hour of your life isn’t going to make it into your highlights showreel.

Once inside, the heaving barn has all the charm of a rugby scrum but without the rigidly enforced rules.

There are no rules, it’s a free for all.

It’s like Rollerball but with ankle-clattering shopping trollies instead of roller skates, crash helmets and motorbikes.

But during all this mayhem one thought refused to leave my head. And it was this. Why is everyone shuffling around like zombies, stockpiling all this stuff? The shops are shut for ONE DAY. If you know the answer then write it on a postcard and send it to the usual address.

The madness of it all can be summed up in this sentence. We sourced and costed Christmas presents for the cats, little cameras which fit on their collars so we could see what they do and where they go. Thankfully we pulled ourselves back from the brink before we hit the ‘Buy Now’ button.

Sorry if this sounds like a moan but that’s what it is. But once the last shop has shut and Amazon’s last delivery time has been and gone then that’s when the fun really starts. Happy Christmas.